Ever catch yourself saying “My life would be so much easier if ______”?
How would you fill in that blank? Perhaps with one or more of these:
- I had more money (or time)
- My boss appreciated me
- My kids would listen to me
- My car/computer/whatever worked reliably
- I could lose weight
- I would just finish ______
Take a few minutes to write down your own list of “easier ifs.” Then reflect on how this list can inform you about where you feel unease in your life.
But don’t stop there. Rather than letting the “easier ifs” serve as excuses, use them as a call to action. Shed the victim mentality that says you can’t be happy until something else happens.
Try this: Use your list to spark a sense of empowerment. Next to each “easier if,” write at least one idea for how to resolve that problem.
If your computer doesn’t work, schedule time with someone who can help. If there aren’t enough hours in the day, take one action (like giving up a TV program) that will free up some time. If you’ve been feeling guilty about not finishing a project, consider deciding not to do it at all.
What will you do to take charge of the unease in your life, rather than letting it run you? Let us know what you come up with.
To your ease!
Pat Daniel, Ph.D.